a Sex therapist's perspective:How coronavirus has made dating an even bigger nightmare
Updated: Aug 5, 2021
Years before I was happily married, I was single and an excellent dater. (Being a good listener really makes a difference!) The world was a different place back then. I could sit very close to someone and touch their hand without wanting to immediately use hand sanitizer afterwards. During that time, we also didn't have to wear masks. I was able to wear an amazing shade of lipstick and smile as often as I deemed necessary to let my dates know that I indeed was having a good time.
Looking back now, I can't imagine not being able to sit close to someone and not being able to show my smile on a date. Of course, people can still sit close and smile when they meet, but the anxiety of contracting Coronavirus does not make things easier.
Already dating is a crapshoot. Most people use dating apps nowadays and there are some things everyone has to deal with. First, anyone can lie their ass off. They can lie about what they look like, what they do, how much money they make, etc.. That is stressful enough: trying to decide how much to trust someone you just met. Also, video dating has become a thing because Coronavirus has made us more careful of the outside world and other people. However, video dating makes connection more difficult.
Meeting someone for the first time on video is different from meeting someone in person. Meeting someone in person can make it easier to know if there is chemistry or if there is a desire to create connection. You definitely can't touch someone's hand with video dating. Remember, touch is an important sense when it comes to relationships, intimacy, and sex. Not being able to have an innocent "accidental" touch of the hand takes away from the dating experience. When you are next to someone in person, you can feel the energy when the date is going successfully. That is harder to capture on Zoom or Facetime. So, there are more unknowns with this Coronavirus nightmare when it comes to dating.
Also, people are taking more chances with their physical and sexual health because of having to isolate. But, let's face it, Individuals need to get laid sometimes. That's the truth. Nevertheless, your physical and sexual health impacts you and anyone that you choose to date. Here are some things that might help with dating right now:
1. If you feel sick, stay home!
2. Have a safety plan if you are meeting someone for the first time and every time.
a. Wear a Mask
b. Do not get close unless both of you have tested negative for Covid-19.
3. When dating someone, go slow and really get to know them. Trust is built over time.
4. Know that Coronavirus will not last forever. Taking care of yourself right now will help you in the present and in the future.
I have other blogs on my website on how to deal with Coronavirus. Additionally, I have a fantastic resource page of videos and books about different topics of sex therapy and mental health you will enjoy.
Stay safe out there!